Ah club shampoo, it's the next state over and about 8 minutes away. Wednesday night is goth night (Nocturne) and then there's the midnight mosh pit and provocatively dressed teenage girls...
Maybe I should return there and cure my lack of female affections.
Just kidding: Female affection is a myth that the entertainment industry and the Illuminati want you to believe so that you buy moar pron to learn how to pleasure them... Then when you're all used up you find out that they're really soulless creatures from a distant planet programmed to feast on the shattered hearts of men!
In turn, after being fed upon, the surviving remnant of what used to be the man grows spiteful and clings desperately to the hopes of what the movies say, committing the act of "cheating" the system and downloading a new corrupted .heart file and thus beginning the cycle all over again, until everyone has AIDS and dies. The End.
...And that, my friends, is where bastard babies come from, Charlie Brown
